The Winter's Grace

Never a complete zero

Neither the (chosen) one,

Nary a dream being an hero

Nor, with skills a ton.

No illusions of grandeur epical

Been a half-way decimal !

Never sought the bright light

Nor the anonymity of dark night

While on the roads straight

Curious with fringes I strayed !

Between the black and white

Have stood, enamoured by twilight!

Gone are those flames of fall,

In this icy morning pall,

Barren trees stick eerie,

The heavy mist rolls in quietly

Street opaque, ahead unseen,

Returning to comfort, I lean!

Deep inside, rises a stirring,

The chill, cold, but refreshing,

Glades sparkles of moist dew,

Birds tweet from their perilous pew,
of faith of day anew.

Piercing the ashen pale, a ray

Or is it hope thataway ?

The grey now holds me

In a gentle embrace, light

Casting path a new sight.

As the long gone dead

Gratefully, once said,

Getting to, at ease, I embrace

Not just a touch, but swathe of grays !

The Fire pit

Should I cross that high bridge
And climb that steep ridge

Should I take on those woes,

Dare to put on the brave shoes

To walk these hard streets

Or buy myself two cold feet?

Should I dare to strife

with things that come to head in life?

Or should I put up these cold feet

With a drink neat in retreat,

Watching life as it passes by?

I'll catch it another day before I die.

Tired to the bone, back I sit,

I'm done, just eff it!

What's the damn point, I rage, I rant

Two cold feet I firmly plant

Comfortably frozen, I stand rooted...

But the voice in me, refused to be muted.

As I look to push away the plate of grits,

A shadow glosses over my nits

Over my flaws, a tapestry knit,

She resets the pieces to a future fit.

I hear a slow rumble in tummy pits...

Are those antsy butterfly flits?

Or are those, long gone embers, relit !

---
suno.ai take on converting this "lyrics" into a song in my favorite genre

Copping Black

Here is some perspective from Trevor Noah on what is going on currently – it is a great perspective. I’ve been thinking about it myself, in the backdrop of the conversation here a few days ago; and in light of Amy Cooper incident. I wonder what would have happened to the Christian Cooper had the cops turned out and for some reason he had not recorded what exactly happened in [see the URL is in the footnote]. Would Christian Cooper automatically be a suspect, taken down, detained and hand-cuffed ? I don’t think any of us will have perfect answer for that, but I think it is more than likely that would happened.

Now, at work, we were asked, if we were all safe due to the protests and rioting. I made a joke that this is nothing, since we are used to more severe forms while growing up in India. But giving it a serious thought, this is where I used to see as black and white (or right or wrong);  now, I find myself hard pressed to get out of shades of grey ! Most revolutions are preceded by (violent) actions against institutionalized oppression. When I start judging rioting, I'm defaulting to my position of privilege, to make that judgement, because it threatens my and my family's safety, and hence rioting is wrong.  Those guys safety is threatened every day. I'm beginning to understand when very famous African Americans talk about visceral fear they feel when they are stopped by cops - Serena Williams (proxy), Michael Bennett, James Blake, so on. The impotent anger when they are stopped, frisked, handcuffed in public at a whim of someone’s mere doubt. What happens to an African American on the street, is something I cannot grasp, hence I think, I don't have the right to judge from my perch [The two interactions I have had with Cops in the US, have both been pleasant, btw]

Here is the link to Trevor Noah’s video, that provides a further context/clarity to my thinking about rioting and looting; and breaking of social contract.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDy3e_VEWms

Note:
Amy Cooper incident: https://www.washingtonpost.com/outlook/2020/05/29/amy-cooper-white-woman/

A perfect 2020 !!

As I look back on the decades of 10s, I can only wish the decade of 20s will be as kind to me/us at the 10s were. 2010s is where we went through the tough road arriving at a very good destination in our lives. We settled;  thankfully got through the really tough times in early 2010s and settled – settled in the new culture, new jobs, new macro routines and new home. It was not (it still isn’t without) conflicts within our minds – there are times, when we feel we are where we shouldn’t be; and we aren’t where we should be, but, the guiding north star has always been one goal. And the 2010s were kind to us towards that goal. We believe now, we are in the vicinity of the goal – and I don’t have any doubt in my mind, that the goal is still afar and the difficulty multiplies as we get closer and closer. And all of us, particularly both of us, have to be in best health and wellness to be able to get there.

 

As we get into 2020s, our guiding star still remains – hopefully, we continue on our true north; we are going to be more deeply and intensely conflicted, with priorities, doubts and what is right and wrong. I just pray/hope that we continue to have that invisible hand that gently prods us to walk towards true north.

Wish you all a great 2020 and wonderful decade of 2020 !

Beyond my window !

Beyond the pane,
Onto the pouring rain,
Distracted instead...
...A beautiful stain!

("The laddie reckons himself to be a poet!")

Why are they still friends?

With most listed here, we have been friends for over 15 years, some for nearly 20+ years... So, here is what I really and sincerely and God-thankfully I appreciate in each of you

A: Be simple, be straight, be positive; and able to see the lighter side of everything. Able to not take oneself seriously and also permeate that level of comfort with friends around. I've learned to simplify things and that not everything needs to be complicated.

A: Simple. Wysiwyg - there are no filters. Peter Pan - although extremely wise, still not really grown :-) Completely true to what he does, with no half-way measures. He has inherently made me to learn more and sometime even teaching learning could be fun :-)

D: Introverted, very sensitive. Readily and without batting an eyelid will go one or 14km extra for a friend; that is his normal day. Dreams big, does big, but hardly makes a big deal out of it. Really has taught me, how to let go of the fort, wall and moat that I would build around me and not really talking about my issues

.

R: Silent, completely ego-less guy - he almost seems to be joyful in submerging his own personality for the good of people around him; always seemed to be truly happy in others' victories (except of course, in Tennis, it has to be himself and Federer). Somewhere, in this world, there are set of mums who are ruing that their daughter wasn't able to ensnare this guy.

R: Not so much in touch, but I believe, I'll just pick up where we left. Again - pretty grounded guy  -- knows himself quite well; will call it as he sees it; there are things that he has told me that has made me a better person today. There is a switch that lights the bulb and comes to you. He has done that several times to me - improving me; and I'm not even talking about work. This is personal.

S: Sincere, hardworking and a total introvert - he is one standing example that tells me that with an effort, we could rewire the brain; I still use these principles with my son. Loyal to the fault, even to the point, he has hurt himself, I truly wish he retires and enjoys life a bit more !

So THANK YOU Guys ! Sincerely !

The Fight !!

Shalini was pissed. Very pissed and angry and mad... Add all the words from thesaurus that could convey the depth of the anger. She was glued to the TV all morning, even bunking the the special 2hr economic lecture today. (The fact that she abhorred the economics, in her very first year of her BA class was orthogonal to this story - her hatred for economics stemming from the fact that she didn't get the complexity of it). But today her hatred for economics was only replaced by her hatred with what is going on - in her mind this was simple to hate. She and her friends talked about it last evening after college at Coffee-day, and sat there for hours debating the pros and cons of it. After coming home, she went to her room, turned on the TV and watched the Arnab talk in his typical aggressive style questioning the Government's decision. At the same time, she tweeted effusively and facebooked prolifically - and retweeted multiple messages and shared multiple facebook messages from her friends. As she had gone to bed, she felt her angst still simmering.

It is now - This morning; she was at the junction of the Victoria statue, near the entrance of Cubbon Park. She and her friends had arrived there on a call by some "Brashtachaar Andolan, the Bangalore Chapter". The call was all the like-minded people to gather at the site to protest the arrest of Anna Hazare and subsequent non-grant of permission by the Delhi Police for Anna to fast in his place of choice. There was this bald-man, who was egging on, saying something in Kannada into the megaphone ! She and her friends held placard and shouted slogans at the government... She was glad, that she along with majority of friends (and her parents) had not voted in the last election and felt a lot less complicit with this Government's decision. The fact that she and her family had some other pressing engagement that day and did not fancy standing in a queue for election. Her dad had joked, if only there was a Tatkal option for voting; and she had promptly facebooked it as her own and got huge amounts of likes.

Coming back to the present, the crowd was getting vocal; Shalini found several friends from her past and there were several youngsters, along with some serious-types (as she thought). The bald man, who was holding forth why Lokpal bill made a lot of sense and why the politicians, including the PM need to be policed. A lady, who seemed to be passer-by, asked the question if we are asking extra-constitutional authority for non-elected representative - the bald man, hemmed and hawed a bit, but at the same time, Shalini and friends boo'ed the lady and started questioning if she was a true Indian!! The lady beat a hasty retreat...

After being around for about 3 hours, it was getting to be evening and Shalini and friends started feeling a bit of ennui... They expected this to be fun, but weren't able to envision an end-game to the evening. Fortunately for them, good news arrived. There was suddenly a commotion. The bald man was conferring with a couple of other people. He, feeling important as the eyes were on him, picked up his cell and called someone ! He was flush with excitement as he animatedly talked alternately in broken Hindi and English... As he was talking he raised his fist up and a cheer went through the crowd, without knowing what really has transpired. The bald-man pocketed his cell, in a very self-important gesture, stood up on a soap-box and announced grandly - "We've won !! The Delhi Police have caved in - Anna will be fasting now !!!! We will get our Jan Lok Pal Bill passed !!!!!"... Immediately, a big cheer went through the crowd. People hugged each other and Shalini and co were ecstatic - they've won. All the tweets, facebook and bunked classes is going to change the world. They decided that they need to go out and celebrate the victory - where else at Coffee day !

She kicked her scooty back to life; and Avi, her class-mate got behind her. He was one of those boys who were extremely talkative and she was glad that he was in the pillion as they talked, feeling an enveloping aura of victory as she drove... Then, shit happened... She suddenly saw a policeman in front of her, flagging her down ! In her discussion, she had erroneously turned into an one-way street !! She slowed down and parked the the scooty, a bit ahead of the policemen. Avi, took her papers and license and took it to the policeman. In her rear-view mirror, Shalini saw Avi talking to the policeman...

In about 5min or so, Avi was back; as she stuffed the papers and started her scooty, she asked, "What happened ?". Avi responded, "I just gave him a twenty; saved a 100 bucks fine; lets go !!"

Of Pigs, PFand Pearls...

I'm part of a Fantasy football league for the past four years - its a pretty easy going league with lot of banter, ill-translated sentences, fun but quite competitive place. It is also run by a commish, who does things pretty much with an iron-hand (:-)). During the commish's tenure, the rabbits' DNAs have mutated, that their 4th leg has become an vestigial limb and can no longer be found... (in the lines of முயல், மூன்று கால் etc).

As the new season unfolds this year, he had decided on the draft order (with a feral and ferrous hand, of course), purportedly based on a lunch meeting at a Pizza joint with a few of the leaguers... My reaction to his post where he had published the draft order was as below:
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The below is the result of sinister conspiracy hatched by neo-fascist extreme-left-wing cabal (of 1) !! The order of draft was totally different...

I'm sure commish would Meddle in, generate proof in terms of a torn masala-dosai smelling napkin that he quickly rushes out and picks up from an Indian restaurant nearby and claim it to be from the Pizza joint. This is so typical of first 4 seasons - I was hoping (against hope) that the Echoes of change that is sounding elsewhere in the world will also come to this league... but alas NO ! From behind the Wall, Commish continues to reign in with an iron hand and puts down any semblance of sense. No doubt, we would be pointed to the change in draft process; Its just a momentary lapse of reason and an aberration of deviant from the dark-side; just an exception that was obscured by clouds of, what appears to be traces of transient sense found in the relics of continuing autocracy.

The draft order is the last straw, the final cut. Let me ring the Division Bell, demand not to be treated as one among Animals and set controls to the heart of the son !!! I'm flaming outta here, praying that a new piper would lead you all to a gates of new dawn ! Bye then...

... until the draft day...
_______________________

Well, I was so disappointed, that except the commish, no one else picked the message of the post !! But life... as they have said...
"Sun is the same in a relative way, but you're older,
shorter of breath, one-day closer to death...
...missing the finer points from 17 channels of shit to choose from !"